So I’m in this show. I wear tight white pants. I had to shave my facial hair because I need to look much younger for this role. I also need to look heavier.

So if you’d like to see a chunky, 12-year-old version of me stuffed into a pair of white trousers tickets are still available.

Let’s be honest. Single Sentence Movie Reviews have taken over this blog. The idea that this is a personal blog is a farce. The movie reviews should have their own separate blog, and now they do. All future SSMRs can be found at SingleSentenceMovieReview.com. (RSS subscribers, you’ll want to head to my lovingly hand-crafted rss feed.

I haven’t moved all the old reviews over yet, but that’s where all the new ones are going up. You also have the opportunity to share your comic genius and beat me at my own game. In place of the traditional blog comments, you can now submit your own sentences to any of the movies that have been reviewed.

As for this blog, it’s free so I don’t see any reason to shut it down. Besides those of you who like to have a little extra reading material every 4-6 months, should not delete this blog from your book marks.

I didn’t realize until I sat down to write this that the message of this movie is a group of men who are above the U.S. legal system is a conspiracy, while an individual who is above the U.S. legal system is a hero.

After tapping into the growing popularity of NASCAR, Will Ferrell is now embracing blue collar America’s other favorite past time.

Here’s a story so good that I want the Theory of Relativity to be wrong.

Final Destination, eat your heart out.

This movie does an excellent job of conveying how this case never came to a truly satisfying conclusion by never coming to a truly satisfying conclusion.

Whatever your views on U.S. foreign policy, hearing that someone interpreted this movie as a support piece for George W. Bush is ten kinds of hilarious.

This is not one of those movies that is more hip and more alluring because it begins by telling me how it is going to end.